Californians Clarify Why They Ought to Secede From The Nation

“​I can’t afford to maneuver, however I’ve at all times needed to reside overseas.”

“I assume all federal fees can be dropped.”

“Why ought to we be ruled by grasping, out-of-touch millionaires in Washington, D.C. when we’ve grasping, out-of-touch billionaires proper right here?”

“We’d be the one nation with a bear on its flag! All different nations would tremble earlier than us, besides probably Albania and it’s mighty two-headed Eagle.”

“It might actually assist shore up our worldwide field workplace numbers.”

“We may do cool cash. Like bizarre shapes and colours. Could possibly be enjoyable.”

“Taxes, I feel?”

“He who controls the almonds, controls the universe.”

“I’ve at all times thought it’s about time we paid much more cash to import water from elsewhere.”

“I’d fairly be ruled by SAG-AFTRA bylaws than the Structure.”

“If we seceded, California would formally be named the ninth planet within the photo voltaic system.”

“I’m tickled by the concept that there might be extra immigrants to dehumanize.”

“I can’t have my children develop up in a rustic the place there’s ugly individuals.”

“I’m extraordinarily impressionable and at all times 100% down for the newest plan I hear about.”

“It’s embarrassing to name Michigan winemakers your countrymen.”

“With all of the enterprise capital funds, we may in all probability create an much more fucked up healthcare system of our personal.”

“My agent stated it might be actually good for my model.”

“It might simply be good to beat Texas at one thing.”